I’m not one for musicals as much as Cathy is, but I love the movie Fiddler on the Roof. My teaching partner, Tara, and I show it to our Bethel freshmen students every year. So it was very fitting on our anniversary Monday that Cathy brought up Fiddler on the Roof as we had a conversation that went a little like a scene in the movie.
After 25 years of marriage, Tevye, the husband, asks his wife, Golde, if she loves him. Their (musical) conversation goes like this:
(Tevye) Do you love me?
(Golde) Do I what?
(Tevye) Do you love me?
(Golde) Do I love you?
(Tevye) Golde, I'm asking you a question... Do you love me?
(Golde) You're a fool
(Tevye) I know. But do you love me?
(Golde) Do I love you?
For twenty-five years I've washed your clothes
Cooked your meals, cleaned your house
Given you children, milked the cow
After twenty-five years, why talk about love right now?
…
(Tevye) And now I'm asking, Golde. Do you love me?
(Golde) I'm your wife
(Tevye) I know. But do you love me?
(Golde) Do I love him?
For twenty-five years I've lived with him
Fought with him, starved with him
Twenty-five years my bed is his
If that's not love, what is?
(Tevye) Then you love me?
(Golde) I suppose I do
(Tevye) And I suppose I love you too
(Both) It doesn't change a thing
But even so
After twenty-five years
It's nice to know
Our conversation didn’t go exactly like that. Instead of 25 years it was 35 years. Instead of milking cows Cathy has done a lot of shopping for me. I am more and more convinced the question, "Do you love me?" is best answered in the simple, even mundane, kind acts we do for each other over and over. Sometimes over and over for 35 or more years.
I disagree with one thing in Tevye and Golde’s song though. Knowing someone loves you changes everything. It’s always good to hear a sincere “I love you.” It is also nice to occasionally to show our love by doing things that aren’t mundane, like enjoying a nice ice cream date together.
(Tevye) Do you love me?
(Golde) Do I what?
(Tevye) Do you love me?
(Golde) Do I love you?
(Tevye) Golde, I'm asking you a question... Do you love me?
(Golde) You're a fool
(Tevye) I know. But do you love me?
(Golde) Do I love you?
For twenty-five years I've washed your clothes
Cooked your meals, cleaned your house
Given you children, milked the cow
After twenty-five years, why talk about love right now?
…
(Tevye) And now I'm asking, Golde. Do you love me?
(Golde) I'm your wife
(Tevye) I know. But do you love me?
(Golde) Do I love him?
For twenty-five years I've lived with him
Fought with him, starved with him
Twenty-five years my bed is his
If that's not love, what is?
(Tevye) Then you love me?
(Golde) I suppose I do
(Tevye) And I suppose I love you too
(Both) It doesn't change a thing
But even so
After twenty-five years
It's nice to know
Our conversation didn’t go exactly like that. Instead of 25 years it was 35 years. Instead of milking cows Cathy has done a lot of shopping for me. I am more and more convinced the question, "Do you love me?" is best answered in the simple, even mundane, kind acts we do for each other over and over. Sometimes over and over for 35 or more years.
I disagree with one thing in Tevye and Golde’s song though. Knowing someone loves you changes everything. It’s always good to hear a sincere “I love you.” It is also nice to occasionally to show our love by doing things that aren’t mundane, like enjoying a nice ice cream date together.
 |  You know me, had to show the ice cream too:) |
RSS Feed